Regardless of the fact what kind of goal you choose to be carry out in the next few months or years you need to be aware that even if your determination is high, you will face a lot of obstacles on the way. The biggest obstacle may actually be you. Regardless of the fact what kind of goal you choose to be carried out in the next few months or years you need to be aware that even if your determination is high, you will face a lot of obstacles on the way. The biggest obstacle may actually be you. Let’s take a simple example: once you decide that during the next 30 days you will run every day at a scheduled time, already after a few days you will start to notice that your attention is drawn to other things than running.
Even though before might have not paid attention to this, suddenly the desk your are working at seems to be very messy and simply needs immediate tidying. To your surprise, a good friend calls and you simply cannot ignore that call as it must be very important. Finally, the time for running has passed and you need to pass to the next thing which is in the schedule.
Finally, you feel guilty because you have not kept your commitment.
All the situations which have been described have been studied in psychology which has tried to explain behaviors linked to quitting resolutions and doing less important things. It has also explained the negative moods resulting from breaking the word given to yourself.
One possible explanation is the phenomenon of the so called self-impediment which means engaging in activities that take the personal responsibility of our shoulders for the defeat but at the same time they minimize chance for success. Engaging in long telephone conversations and endless tidying are just some examples which show how to diminish the responsibility for completing the task.
The award for such actions is a short, pleasant moment during which you don’t feel so overwhelmed with responsibilities. Research shows that these type of behaviors are especially visible in cases when our self-esteem is endangered and we are not sure about the future results.
Another trap we might fall into is the so called learned self-helplessness which is one of the most important causes of depression. To put it simply, this happens when we fail many times in the same area. If you take up running and you fail to run a marathon many times or you deny yourself this activity, you start to feel helpless in relation to your resolution.
Thoughts arise that sport is not for you. You feel helpless towards the goal and you quit.
Awareness of those two phenomena could be helpful in discovering the two patterns of action and how you postpone action. It is worth noting that procrastination can be a source of information about the task itself and why it is pertinent to you.